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Showing posts with label Sex. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Sex. Show all posts

Tuesday, 2 August 2011

Worried about not being able to have kids with your "part-time" English teaching job? Well, I've got some news for you which I hope will make you as happy as it made me.


As long as your employer allows time off as maternity leave (paid or not), and you have the shakai hoken health insurance deal (many companies make you pay this by default, and JETs, BoE ALTs and some dispatch ALT employees will find themselves paying (a lot) for this every month) the government will pay you around 2/3rds of your daily salary for a period of up to 98 days. The schedule seems fixed to starting 42 days before the birth, and ending 56 days after. Not overly generous, but better than nothing.

If your company does pay for your maternity leave (though why would they when the government will do it for them?), then the government will only grant you payment if your company pays less than 2/3 of your regular wage (in other words, they will make sure you get 2/3rds of your wage as a minimum).

You can read more about the small-print on the (now defunct, but still accurate) Social Insurance Agency website:
How to Claim Your Benefit
To claim your benefit, you need to file the “Application for Maternity Allowance” (SHUSSAN TEATEKIN SHIKYU SHINSEISHO) to the Social Insurance Office (including one in a Social Insurance Bureau). We need certification by your employer and comment by your doctor on the Application form. For your first application, you need to submit photocopy of evidence such as your “payroll book” (CHINGIN DAICHO) and “attendance book” (SHUKKINBO). The deadline to file the claim is determined for each benefit payable day. You need to file a claim within 2 years from the next day of the day for which your benefit is payable.



Sunday, 24 July 2011

Nampa is the Japanese term for guys picking up on girls in public locations, usually with the sole aim of getting them into bed. A whole subculture has sprung up around the word, and akin to titles like "How to Talk to Women" and "How to Make Someone Fall in Love With You in 6.7 Seconds" in English bookstores and across English webpages, "How to Nampa" is a term probably every magazine with a 20-something male target audience in Japan has published articles about.


In today's Q&A, we read up on the adventures of one particular Nampa artist, "Shimada," in the Osaka area, who is perhaps a bit past his prime at 30-odd years old but still updates his blogs with specific Nampa success stories in various places around the country. The basic routine seems to be: Truck out to somewhere for an afternoon, invite women out on the street to go for a drink, then escort whomever accepted the bait to a love hotel, leaving early enough to catch the last train home.

Ouch. That's right. He doesn't even want to wake up next to her.

Anyway, let's take a look at some of the tricks of the trade!



So there I am, in a cheap izakaya.
The girl I'm scoping is like this:

Age: 21
Blood Type: B
Occupation: Medical Secretary
Name: "Saori"

I sidle up to her and say, "So, this is the place to be, huh?"
She laughs at me.
The izakaya we're in is famous in Osaka for being dirt-cheap.
It's got a name like something-"factory."

Anyway, so we toast with beers, then I introduce myself and make some empty small talk.
We talk about her job...
Saori apparently doesn't want to work at all.
She thinks work is a waste of her life, so I tell her what's up.

There's nothing not worth doing in this whole world.
You only make a decision that something's worthless.
A person's wisdom is in how they find meaning in and ascribe value to the things they do.

I know I have her.

I'm completely full of myself.
'Cause this is first-rate stuff, right?
Even though I, Shimada, am a fourth-rate human being.

Anyway, I'm already pretty drunk.
I've been drinking since I started scoping chicks in the afternoon.

Next we talk about love...
...and I shut her down on that topic as fast I can.

Next we talk about dirty stuff...
...and I keep that going as long as I can.

By the time we know it, it's 9 p.m.
By my CVP Analysis, I arrive at a conclusion.

(What's a CVP Analysis?
C = Shimada
V = Victory
P = Project
It's what I call analyzing how much a chick digs me, and coming up with an action plan for the night by catching the subtle changes in her mood.)

So I say to her, "Let's make the after-party a 'Snack Party'!"

(What's a "Snack Party"?
You buy a bunch of cookies and potato chips at a convenience store then take her to a love hotel to eat them.)

Saori loves snacks.
So she's totally into the idea.

We leave the izakaya and buy some stuff at the nearest convenience store.

"Where're we gonna have the party?" she asks.

"At karaoke," I tell her.

"We can take snacks into a karaoke room?" she asks.

I say, "Oh, you're right... How about we have it at my summer house then?"

"Where is it?" she looks at me.

"Follow me!"

And we're off.
We hold hands all the way to the love hotel.

I'm stoked.
There have been so many stupid things happening since this year started.
So, finally... Finally...

But!
Turns out it's not so easy.

When we get in front of the "summer house," Saori, as expected, gets cold feet and starts whining.
(What a pain.)

"What's the matter?" I ask her. "You aren't thinking of something naughty, are you? Saori, you're such a terrible girl."

I remember saying something like...

"I hear this place is modeled on a storehouse in a town on the edge of the Mediterranean, and I've wanted to see it myself once." (We'd talked about how we're both interested in the Roman Empire at the izakaya. I'm not really, though.)

And I remember saying something like...

"This isn't even a hotel! It's a party space!"

Then finally I swore, "I won't do anything," and we pinky promised on it, and we went inside.

(What's a pinky promise?
It's some magic charm. You cross pinkies on a promise and if you break the promise you have to eat a thousand needles. Except, apparently if you break the promise nothing bad actually happens...)

By now it's already 9:30!
I'm almost out of time!

The second we're inside the "party space," I've got my hands all over her.
She protests, but I keep at it and suddenly there's this dramatic change in her.
I mean, wow.
So things get going, and the snacks we bought sit there unopened.

Then it's past 10, and time for the party to end.
I make a dash for the subway, barely making it home by 11.

It's an hour past my curfew, but I'm met at home with a kind smile.
...which is scarier than the old lady getting mad at me.

Her retaliation comes the next day at dinner.
All that's on my plate is a pile of veggies, while she enjoys homemade fried chicken.



Sunday, 8 May 2011

I hope this doesn't excite my family too much, but recently I've been looking into the logistics of childbirth in Japan. Hence the forthcoming post on maternity leave (see next week).

It seems that the Japanese process typically involves a 6+ day stay in hospital for mother and baby, during which time you learn about aftercare for your newborn etc. Understandably, this isn't a cheap period of your life. Luckily, provided you're paying the shakai hoken (social health insurance) you can expect to get the vast majority of that money back, if not more.

In fact, even if you don't stay the full time, or even don't go to hospital at all and find your own midwife, you'll still get that money (approx. 420,000yen depending on your area).

For more, here's an extract from a recent article in the Japan Times:
Expected costs of childbirth in Japan
A 2009 health ministry-funded survey of 2,886 hospitals and clinics showed that the average cost of delivery was ¥423,957 nationally, and ¥459,260 in the Kanto region. The cheapest area in which to give birth was the Kyushu- Okinawa region, where the average cost was ¥393,671.The average length of stay was 6.28 days nationally. Prices are higher if you choose a single room, give birth at night or on a weekend and ask for an epidural.Women covered by the public health insurance scheme can get up to ¥420,000 of their costs subsidized by the government.Costs of prenatal visits to doctors and midwives also vary, but many municipal governments issue vouchers for free prenatal screenings at hospitals, clinics and midwife-led birth centers.


  • If you decide to do a home or private birth, you may need to find a midwife. A good place to start on that route is the Midwives Association of Japan (most of the important stuff is in Japanese).
  • Beware that the regular Japanese birthing process may be culturally different from what you may expect. If  you have "special" requests, such as the father being allowed in the room during birth, no painkillers, sleeping in the same room as the baby in hospital etc, you will have to find a doctor/hospital that is okay with those.
  • A great community site to help you with the raising, matriculation, health care etc of your child in Japan is Japan With Kids.
  • A useful personal account of having twins in Japan can be found on this website.
  • I came across this excellent article from the Alien Times, which I've pasted in full here just in case it ever vanishes:
     
  • Pregnancy and Giving Birth in Japan

    Author:Anna Hamakoji, Issue: November 2001, April 2007 Topic: Children
    Going through pregnancy and giving birth is difficult enough in one's own country, so going through that in a foreign country makes it all that much more difficult. The following is a brief description of what you need to do and what to expect if you are having a baby here in Japan.
    Once a doctor has confirmed your pregnancy, you must register your pregnancy at your nearest health center.
    Take your Alien Registration (AR) Card and fill out a form with your name and address, giving the name of the doctor and the name and address of the medical institution he or she is affiliated with. (You can also ask the clinic/hospital to give you a "certificate of pregnancy" to give to the health center). The center will give you a Mother-Child Book (boshi techo), in which will be recorded the course of your pregnancy and the birth, as well as your baby's growth and immunization records. Be sure to take it to each prenatal visit and, of course, to the birth. You can choose to have bilingual copies. Tsukuba City has the following: English/Japanese, Korean/Japanese, Chinese/Japanese, Tai/Japanese, Portuguese/Japanese and Tagalog/Japanese
    Included in the "boshi techo" is a packet containing local information and immunization schedules. Also included are two coupons that are for health check ups, one in early and one in late pregnancy. There is also a form that will give you a Y1300 reduction on the HIV test (required for all pregnant women).
    After registering your pregnancy, you will need to think about what kind of birth you want or need and where and how you are going to have it. In choosing the place of birth, you will need some idea of what kind of birth you want/need considering your physical condition, Japanese language ability, financial situation, etc. In Japan, fathers are not always permitted at the birth. At some facilities, fathers are allowed only into the labor room, but not the delivery room. At others he can only wait in the waiting room. Some places though, encourage fathers to participate and sometimes, if you have communication problems, they might even allow you to bring a friend who can interpret and assist you. Always ask for such information. Developing realistic expectations and making adequate preparations will help you to have a safe and satisfying experience.
    For foreigners in Tsukuba, there are several places to choose from. I will here only comment on the ones I know personally. There might be others that are good as well. If you have any information please write to the Alien Times.
    The most popular clinic is probably the Shoji Clinic in Yatabe. Dr Shoji and his wife, who is the pediatrician, have lived in the U.S. and both speak English well. Dr. Shoji and his staff are used to foreigners and they always try their best to accommodate each person's special needs. The name is Shoji Sanfujinka Clinic and is located at Yatabe 1562 (Tel: 029-836-0405). It is closed on Mondays, Thursdays, and the 1st, 3rd & 5th Sunday and national holidays. On Mondays there is a female doctor available (as of March 2007), Dr. Saito.
    Then there are two hospitals that are seeing a lot of foreign women -- Tsukuba Gakuen Hospital and Tsukuba University Hospital.
    Gakuen hospital is popular maybe because there are several female doctors to go to for checkups. Dr. Sato and Dr. Kawasaki are especially popular because they speak English. Dr. Sato sees patients on Tuesdays and Wednesdays.Dr. Kawasaki on Monday mornings and Thursdays. You cannot know, however, whether they will be available at the time of your delivery. If not, you will just have to do with the doctor who is on duty. Husbands are allowed into the delivery room if they have attended birth classes at the hospital. Tsukuba Gakuen Hospital is located at Kami Yokoba 2573-1 (Tel: 029-836-1355). For appointments call the appointment center 836-6688
    Tsukuba University Hospital is often the place to go to if you are in need of special care or if there are complications during your pregnancy. It is also the cheapest of all hospitals, although the cost difference between clinics and hospital isn't that much. The total cost depends on your situation, the time of delivery (night & weekend are more expensive than "office hours") how many days you stay after delivery, whether it is a private room or not, etc. The university hospital has several doctors that can speak various levels of English, they also have female doctors and if you ask for it they will try their best to make sure you are examined by a female doctor. You can however not request one to be at your birth, but most days there is usually a female doctor on duty. Husbands are not allowed into the delivery room. Tsukuba University Hospital is located at Amakubo 2-1-2. You need to call 029-853-3570 for an appointment (or go to the appointment counter between 8:30am and 11am.)
    Another option is a midwife clinic. There is one in Ina City (about 20 min. from Tsukuba) that accepts foreigners. It is called Baby Healthy Mirai and its address is Ina-Machi, Minami Ohta 500-1 (Tel: 0297-58-3708). It is closed on Fridays. This is a perfect place for someone wanting an "at home birth" atmosphere.
    Typically, a prenatal visit costs between Y3,500 and Y10,000 depending on the place and how many tests are performed. At some facilities, ultra sound is routine and included in the fee. Other places might do them only once or twice and charge extra. Other tests, such as amniocentesis, can raise the fee as well. The average cost of a normal delivery and a 5-7 day stay is currently Y350,000-Y450,000.
    For the pregnant foreigner, it can be advantageous to join the National Health Insurance scheme. It provides some special benefits for pregnant women. Depending on your taxable income, you may qualify for this help. For a couple with no kids, the income limit is Y4,010,000/year. For each additional dependent, add Y300,000.
    Some of the most common benefits are free medical care for pregnant women and assistance for childbirth expenses given to the woman after the birth. You need to apply for this aid at the city office.
    So what do you need to do after the baby has come? First, before the birth, you should contact your embassy and find out the procedure for obtaining a passport for the baby. After the birth, the hospital will give you a birth certificate. The left side of the document will already have been filled in by the hospital and you need to fill-in the right side and submit it to the city office. The document has to be written in Japanese and the person at the city office is forbidden to do it for you so you need to find someone who can help you write it.
    Take this document, both parent's passports and alien registration cards, the Mother-Child book and go to the Sakura branch of the City office. Your child will be registered and an alien registration card will be issued.
    If you have National Health Insurance, you also need to enter your child's name on to the insurance card, and depending on your income, you can apply for "marufuku," which is free medical care for infants.
    You can also apply for the "bunben hiyo haraimodoshi" which is the assistance for child birth expenses. Bring your bankbook with you (not just your cash card (ATM card)) and if you use a "hanko" seal, don't forget to bring that too.
    There is also child benefit called "jidouteate" for low income families. It is Y5000 per month, (Y10,000 per month from the 3rd child.) Ask at the child welfare counter.
    All of these procedures can be done in one visit to the city office if you bring all the necessary documents. The city office, however, will not give you any official copies of the birth certificate on the same day that you apply for it. For some reason you have to wait at least one day. An official copy of the birth certificate costs Y400. Remember to ask your embassy how many they require.
    The hospital may also, at your request, write a document in English stating that "Ms xxx had a baby girl on month/day". This document has no legal meaning in Japan and the father's name is not included, so make sure you get official copies of the Japanese version since that is the only legal document concerning your child's birth.
    You have to apply for a visa (residence permission) within 30 days of the birth. To avoid any penalties, you have to apply within 30 days whether you have got the child's passport or not. If you have applied for a passport but haven't got it yet, bring the document showing that you have applied with you to the immigration office. You also need to bring your child's Japanese birth certificate and alien registration card for child, mother, and father. And a "certificate of alien registration" where all family members are included is recommended. After you have been to Mito you need to go back to the Sakura branch again and they will write the new information on your child's alien registration card.
    After all of this, you are finished with the "paper work" and can concentrate on the parenting, but that is another story. Good Luck!!



Sunday, 13 February 2011

Japan's propensity towards weird sexual perversions was semi-covered in an earlier post about pornography; but we failed to mention the obsession with hanging out in the company of schoolgirls.

And today is Valentine's Day, so what better way for you lonely people out there to enjoy your day than fantasising about expensive dates with hot, underage Japanese schoolgirls? Hell, you could even call one up and do it!



It seems that what I would call a very large percentage (between 5 and 13%) of highschool aged girls have sold their company to much older men (and according to the same source 75% have been approached about taking part) in the ritual known as compensated dating (wish I got compensated for dating my girlfriend. Ziiing!).

They don't necessarily have sex with them (though many do), but will hang around and laugh at their jokes in exchange for money; somewhat like a hostess bar except much more dangerous for the girl.

What turned out to be a quite nasty film about this goes under the title of Love & Pop, directed by Hideaki Anno (of Neon Genesis Evangelion fame). There's also a decent yet tragically short BBC documentary about the Japanese Sex Scene, cleverly called Sex in Japan, which floats around on the internet.


It seems like these Japanese school-girls' desire for bling and the hi-tech doesn't materialise itself in begging their fathers or getting a part-time job (the latter appears in low-regard), but rather seeking out a more immediately profitable sideline. It does seem to pay very well, too. A simple karaoke trip reportedly pays around 10,000yen for 2-3 hours, while a girl willing to add sex to the deal can expect to get around four times that, according to one source. While 7-11 offers around 700yen an hour...
Be assured, however, that this is far from legal. Along with a mild clampdown on child porn, laws introduced in 1999 sought to punish those paying for sex with under 18s. The exact punishment is hard to pinpoint, however. I even read a second-hand report of a doctor having all serious prosecution waved because he was important to his community. It seems the fine was pretty low anyway - around 40,000 yen* according to several sources.
*Although these figures were accurate for decades past, in the more recent video below you can see a suspect arrested and facing much heavier fines along with jail time for associating with a junior high school student.


The process of finding a willing girl finds it's starting point with a call-centre arrangement (or web site). Here girls can set up an answer-phone (for free) through some shady "make dates here" company, for men to call/text (at expense) and ask for a date. If they like the sound of the guy and the deal, they can call them back and arrange a time and place. How romantic.

After life as a highschool dial-a-date, several girls have confessed to having gone on to be contract lovers for reams of men. The deal seems great for the girls - men pay upwards of 50,000yen a month for a handful of "meetings", and it's not unusual for the women to have half a dozen men on the go at once. Of course, these girls are not much more than pimpless whores; but who are we to judge? Work opportunities as grim-faced hostesses being groped by alcoholic, married salarymen are also open to enjo kousai graduates, I'm sure.
However, this kind of sex-work isn't as frowned upon as it may be in your country. Excellent documentary The Great Happiness Space focuses on male hosts in host bars and their (mostly) sex-worker customers to give a fascinating insight.
Asia Times' compensated dating apologist William Sparrow argues the "victimless" nature of the crime, though I would have to point out that children as young as 12 can be involved in this. Whether or not it should be a legitimate or unpunished practice is too much of a big deal for AccessJ, but if you want to discuss it in the comments below, then please do.




More




Friday, 10 September 2010

The leading choice for contraception in Japan is condoms, the second most popular (almost 20%) being pulling out, followed by the rythm method. The pill languishes in last place with an audience of just over 2% of the female population (vs. 18% in the US, 25% in the UK and 52% in Germany, for example).


Not surprisingly, this leads to a fairly large number of abortions. 28% of the 300,000 or so women who underwent abortions last year claimed not being married as the primary reason.

Reportedly a large number of Japanese women don't consider contraception to be their responsibility, and are put-off by the price and stories of horrible side-effects. In fact, when the pill was introduced a survey showed that 70% of women would never consider trying it.

However, it's strange that a country so lax with protecting themselves during sex isn't flooded with children. Japan's aging population is a constant worry, and no amount of sex-standing-up contraception seems to be helping. Although the number of abortions sounds high, it's still less than half of those of the US or UK.

It's also true that an increased use of the pill is usually coupled with an increase in life-threatening STDs like HIV.


Anyway, this is starting to get too complex for AccessJ! Here are the rules on contraception in Japan:

  • The Pill
    There are strict rules on bringing the pill into the country. It must be prescribed to you, and you're only allowed two months' supply. My girlfriend tried to bring more than that and had her parcel got stopped at customs waiting for her permission to destroy the contents. They wouldn't even send it back to England.
    You can get prescribed it here by an obstetrician and it costs about 3000yen per month, and you have to go back every three months for a check-up (not free).
    I recently found a great article about the types of Pill available in Japan.
  • Depo-provera is not permitted.
    You can't bring it with you, and no-one will import it or inject you with it even with a prescription. However, there are similar shots available. Ask a gynecologist.
  • Contraception patches
    There are several types of estrogen-only patches available (on insurance).
  • Gels
    Several types containing both progestogen and estrogen.
  • Condoms
    Japanese condoms are okay, but (it's not a joke) they will not always fit Western men comfortably. They may also come off more easily than what you're used to. There are several shops in the big cities that sell all sizes and shapes. Look for The Condom Store, Condomania or places like that.
  • The morning-after pill
    Is very expensive (10,000yen and up) and not covered by health insurance, though I have heard of it going for only 3,000yen in Okinawa. It's referred to as the "aafutaa piru" and you need to see a gynecologist to get one. International clinics will also prescribe it to you if necessary.

Sources:

Any other methods or comments? Add them to the comments below.



Thursday, 12 August 2010

A soapland is a brothel. You pay a woman to use her naked body to clean you. She gets you all foamed up, uses her boobs and ass like a sponge and then fulfills the rest of your agreement.

If all this is making you reconsider your opinion of prostitution then you certainly aren't alone.


Starting out as a remedy to the illegality of blatant prostitution, soaplands called themselves "Turkish Baths" and pretended nothing funny went on. Some Turkish guy got mad about the stain on the impeccable reputation of his nations bathing and forced a name-change. Did he try it first, I wonder?

Although whoring yourself out is technically illegal, the soaplands work on the basis of renting you the room alone. What you do inside the room is up to you and the woman. It's perfectly legal to agree to exchange money for sexual gratification (and it's going to be something like 20-80,000yen. To be honest I don't really understand where the line is drawn. Some places openly advertise what you can get and for how much, so how this differs from regular prostitution is a mystery to me. Apparently the law (which has no explicit punishment) forbids all types of compensated coital acts, but any other hole, limb or cavity is fine. That doesn't stop open advertisement for FS (furu sekusu), though, which is presumably vaginal. It seems this is because it's so popular and earns the government a lot of tax money.


However, if you want to delve into this world then you better be prepared for racial-based rejection. Something about gaijin is a no-go for a lot of these girls, so be ready for disappointment. I can't give you any first-hand experience, but there are plenty of websites out there to help you find a fitting young lady, and also tell you the hotspots to go looking should you so desire.

I haven't heard of any switched-sex arrangements (i.e. man bathing woman), but an open-minded lady can reportedly get herself a same-sex scrubbing.

A very good and often-cited book about Japan's scorching-hot erotic underworld is "Japan's Sex Trade: A Journey Through Japan's Erotic Sub-Cultures" by Peter Constantine. Well worth reading if you have a genuine interest in the secret life of Japan.


.



Tuesday, 27 July 2010

For a country often lauded on marks of social sensitivity and public safety, Japan has its share of dark patches. One of the most shocking by Western standards is the porn industry.

Warning:
This post is disgusting. If you don't want to be offended and saddened, you probably shouldn't read it.

Without even considering hentai, Japanese porn has a lot going against it. For a start, Japanese censorship laws dictate that the important bits must be pixelated, which means that you can't quite see why the girl is acting like she's in so much pain.

But despite those harsh restrictions, adult media is very publicly available across the country; nearly every Japanese convenience store has an "Adults Only" section of the magazine rack. And perhaps because of censorship restrictions, the variety of content in the country is never-ending. Unedited depiction of intercourse is illegal, but only in the letter of the law. Imagery of obscene acts involving body fluids, uniforms, costumes, game shows, or even insects, sells in droves. And Japanese people who don't approve of it seem to simply avert their eyes.

The Internet has fostered a similar haven of deviance on a global scale. And yes, it probably out-does Japan every time. But only in Japan does it seem to be granted a physical body. Only here can you walk into a store and see this:




This whole section is titled レイプ, or "rape" to you and me. This type of porn typically makes up about 20% of all porn sales. Try as I might, I've only ever found one shelf of men being raped with strap-ons.

I've heard a lot of people defend Japan's violent sexual media as an outlet for what would otherwise be a rapist or paedophile. And the criminal numbers seem to be in favour of that excuse. UN statistics indicate Japan's rape averages as 1/24th that of the USA and 1/20th the UK's.

Further investigation, however, produces a different explanation: The definition of "what rape is" in Japan is very narrow, and attempted prosecution may lead not only to a rejected case, but to the blame being attributed to the victim (see Sexual Violence and the Law in Japan by Catherine Burns); thanks to a severe gender bias in the legal system. For this reason, it is possible that many more Japanese victims exist who are unwilling to report the crime (though numbers of reports have started to increase since a high-profile serial-gang-rape case made national news.)

The idea that watching rape porn quells the desire for real rape is generally argued to be false. Indeed, how could it be otherwise? Surely a rapists desire isn't just one of observing the mistreatment of a woman, but actively being involved in it. The absurd popularity of this genre only supports the concept of rape being "a fantasy, rather than a crime" for many Japanese men.

Even more disturbing, but very telling of the industry's unrestrained extent, is this section; liable to turn up in many adult shops:


This is lolita porn, not in the "Barely Legal" sense, but featuring real kids. Children.

It flies under the radar because there's no "actual" nudity or abuse. The kids are just provocatively posing or messing around, and the director passes it off as artistic (presumably the intense camel-toe on the girl on the left is just incidental then). But this is for sale. In the porn section.

I don't know what else to say.